WHO TAUGHT THESE BOYS TO FLOAT, DRAW IN SAND, AND SKIP STONES!
I saw a concrete plant name titan. A car stopped us to tell us our trailer tail light was out. The old woman was wearing a white bucket hat. My dad looked at her and said “hey, you want to trade hats” she scuffled out of her car at the intersection and my dad traded for his baseball cap. She drove off and now he is wearing this rediculous hat
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Fishing in the Keys until Sunday, then flying out to California Wednesday. Tuna to Choona
B to the O to the R to the E to the D
Whats your middle name? Arthur How big is your bed? Queen Size What are you listening to right now? God is an Astronaut What are the last 4 digits in your cellphone number? 6648 What was the last thing you ate? A Vanilla Milkshake Last person you hugged? My Cowoerker Jowe on my last day of work How is the weather right now? Sunny, blazing hot, the air is made of water Who was the last...
Notice corn in my poop Wonder if I even ate corn this WEEK Oh Yeah, I had Chipotle yesterday Feel Accomplished that I figured out the mystery of corn in my poop Actually feel accomplished Wtf me
juenavei: wow wow
I LOOKED AT MY SNARE DRUM AND ITS STRETCHED SKIN RESEMBLANCE AND THOUGHT ABOUT STABBING IT AND RUINING ITS ASSEMBLANCE BUT THE ARTIST INSIDE OF ME THOUGHT IT NOT TO BE WORTH IT SO I FLIPPED THE KNIFE AROUND AND BANGED A BEAT WITH A PURPOSE
When you are too lazy to throw pizza rolls in the microwave when hungry. A low point.
Merry… Merry… Mary… You’re joining the list of untouched prospects.
Venetian Snares: It’s like sonic crack!
I saw a catapillar dig a grave today.
Things I didn't know:
My shaving cream contains propane and comes from Dublin, Ohio.
Vasili had a burning sensation in the back of his head. Far, far back. He had a hard time identifying a cause. It was late at night and he just wanted to sleep more than anything else. His days at work were becoming increasingly harder to endure each day. Socially. He couldn’t look at anyone without getting angry inside. The man at work in the cubicle next to him, Sergei, was getting a...
I’ve got homework today and that’s all I can think of.
I did something weird just now. I smelled my feet because they have been rubbing on the carpet that have been stenched with the smell of my dog.
Scythe (Old Jeans, Ripped Shirt, Green Stained...
He sat in a frying pan. Frying alive under the sun. His skin boiling, and evaporating from his body. The Titans staring at him with hungry faces. Flipped into the air with a quick jerk… “BREAKFAST IS READY!” Awakened under soft sheets, he emerges only to be blinded by the rising sun in the window. His checklist begins: Bowl of cereal with whole milk Tooth brush and crest He...
He was searching for a scalpel so he could make finger puppets for the little kids.